I'm so not eating that!

Last year on Valentines day Mom decided she wanted a theme. A red theme. She only made foods that were red. Lasguana was the main corse last year. My mom is culenary challanged *she can't cook.* The lasguana ended up being crunchy....and had a greenish tent.......and well........it was possibly some of the worst stuff I've had in a long while.

This year, no theme. Shes making Chicken Cassrole and I, for the first time in like forever, am doing Algebra on the table. Mom runs from the kicthen to the living room screaming "DON DON!" I look up from my work, grandfather dosn't. Then I here snips of the conversationg taking place in the other room "Is it bad if................I know that!.........GASP!....Oh crap....."

 Then mom runs from the living room, back past the table, and into the kitchen in a worried heep. I look up a bit worried about dinner, grandfather is yet again unaware of anything other then the homework before him. I hear "Oh crap.......that was venagor...." THen the sounds of running water and a few more words I shall not repete.

Somethings gone wrong again because she runs to my dad in the other room. No Grandfather still hasn't looked up. I hear "YOU PUT WHAT!" I really feel bad for her...It should be this hard for her to cook dinner. "......just put corn starch..that SHOULD help..." Mom returns to the stove only to say "Honey...is it supposed to do this?" She put it in wrong......plane.......with out water.....I'm so going to die from eating this.... "No...its not supposed to fizz....what the???" Now I feel sorry for Dad who got stuck with a girl who can't follow the simplest of recipies. "Well....maybe its the baking soda?"

Crap. Who the heck puts baking soda in cassaroll! I'm dead...so so dead....Dad however is being patient. Perhaps thats in honor of the holiday.

"Hony...Why is there baking soda in that?"

"I uh......thought it was starch....." Nifty...Now I have a volcano for what was at one time supposed to be my dinner....And this Algebra isn't doing its self. It is at this time we finish and Grandfather looks up. He's totally obliviouse to whats been going on and starts telling everyone about a dream he had.....this is while mom and dad are in the kitchen running around trying to save Valentines Day.

All in all I've learned 2 things.

1. Baking Soda is no substitute for Starch

2. Never, I repete never, let mom cook.